Over the Ledge
Inspired by Nathan’s blog, I decided to share an unusually vivid dream I had this morning.
I have been waking up during the night in the past several days due to our cat, Caviar. We think that she is probably in heat and hope that getting her “fixed” later this month will help. The reason I mention it is because it may have something to do with the vividness of the dream and my remembering it.
The dream(s) that I remember started with me going shooting with my grandpa (never did that before) and the next thing I remember is the main plot line:
Jamie and I were at some friends’ house who had several children. My Mom was there and perhaps some others. Dinner was finished and we were sitting around downstairs talking in a living room area. My Mom began to talk about something spiritual (as if teaching a Sunday School class) and was reading excerpts from a book I believe. She suggested we all go outside for some object lesson with the kids. They started out the sliding glass door that was in the room and led out to the back yard.
Jamie and I had been needing to leave to get to work on time or something. [I couldn’t quite calculate the time as I do to figure the deadline for leaving, but knew we should do it soon]. This was a good opportunity, so we began saying our goodbyes and getting ready (don’t know what that entailed). Jamie was waiting in the car, but I was because intrigued with my Mom’s lesson.
Mom had all the kids up top near this ledge and I could hear her down below directing the adults to gather some leaves into a pile. I thought, “Oh, this is that faith thing where you fall into someone’s arms and they’re just adding leaves to make it safer”. [All this time I’m watching from a ways back because I was on my way to the car.] My Mom was then at the top giving one of the younger girls directions as she stood on the ledge with her back to the fall. As she fell, I ran over to the ledge to see what was happening. It was a much much greater distance to the ground than I thought (probably at least 50 feet). I also noticed there was no pile of leaves and her Dad standing on the ground was not approaching to intercept her fall. She hit the ground flat on her back and bounced back up with no injuries. I thought, “She’s young so her bones are still bouncy” but didn’t really get what the lesson was supposed to be about. I lost interest (and memory) as the other children tried it.
[at some point I looked at the book my Mom was using and it showed diagrams of a pile of leaves and then removing it and a sheet over it or something]
It was some other time, late at night and (though I didn’t realize it until I woke up) it was if I was watching TV. [I guess I left long before with Jamie and was now disconnected from the story watching the conclusion.] I saw the oldest girl that was allowed to jump (still young enough) on the edge of the ledge looking down. There were lights down below and the faint clamor of a dinner party. I thought myself, “She’s going to try it again but this time she’ll get hurt because she’ll land on one of the tables or something”. [This thought was in the disinterested analytical way of one watching TV.] She said as she walking back a ways, “I’m going to kill myself or [something] or [something else]. She then got a running head start and as she got to the edge she twisted around and jumped backwards. [The scene shifted to a side view following her down and watching her spin around uncontrollably.] I knew she would get hurt.
The next thing was just a series of shots of newspaper clippings and photos of the family with newscaster voice-over (like in some movies). She apparently survived, but was seriously hurt and I remember wondering whether she was paralyzed because she looked it in the pictures.
Analysis:
The dream was dark and began first person (which is almost always the case in my dreams). The weird thing was that it switched to narrative as I watched the rest of the story. I can’t stress how rarely my dreams deviate from first person. This could be due to the fact that we were watching TV earlier (it was CSI night). Something else that may have caused the last part of the dream is my job. I copy insurance claim files and often see newspaper articles and graphic photos of fatalities. These files affect me quite deeply on a strange level and I can’t quite figure it out which probably accounts for the reappearance of the theme in my dream. I also copied a fatality at the end of the day yesterday. I noted that it was one because of a newspaper article. There was no photos, though and because I was trying to hurry up so I could leave, I forgot about it and didn’t go through the usual inquisitive introspection and mourning (if you will) I usually go through.
I don’t know about all the rest and this is getting long. I am glad I wrote this because I didn’t even think about all this stuff before (not even after telling my wife about it). Writing a dream is helpful in working it out some. Thanks for the idea, Nathan!