God helps those who turn to Him with a broken heart as I found out yet again on Friday night. A lot of my failures all came together and woke me up with a clear picture of my need for Jesus Christ in my life and the lack of love in my heart.
I went for a drive to nowhere in particular and poured out my pain to the Almighty Father. He heard and gave me a wonderful peace. I ended up in an old chapel on the campus of a local college, where the meeting had just ended. I was left in peace as I sat in one of the back rows and prayed earnestly. When I was alone, I went up to the front and kneeled down to humble myself before God in worship as I continued to pray. Just before the security guard locked the last door, I believe God showed me something. He wants me to trust in His Son, Jesus for discipleship as well as seeking someone out to disciple me. That’s what I care about: Being a disciple of Jesus and making disciples.
I have a long road ahead, but I praise God that He cares for me! I hope to be the godly man Jesus has called me to be, to be subject to Him and those He has placed over me and
to be a servant-leader to Jamie as well as those God places in my life as disciples.
Update 2004.12.13: Chris at Our Greenroom wrote a good article today: Christian or Disciple? It’s good to know that others are pondering this as I think it is essential that we focus on this more in our churches and in missions. I’ll be pondering this some more even as I strive to be a disciple of Christ.