The Naked Green

I’ve been struggling with balance, lately. I’ve been working a lot on web design lately, which is also my hobby. It’s wonderful to do something I love and express the God-given desire and skill to create. I feel like it’s detracting from my relationships, though…my relationship with God and my wife, Jamie. It’s not that I work all the time, but I always seem to be thinking about web design…trying to escape into the world of XHTML, CSS, PHP, etc.

Often in my prayers, I have been telling God that my budding business (really a seedling now) is His. Today, I echoed that saying, “Father, you are the owner of this business.” I started to say, “if this business gets in the way of my relationship with you or Jamie…” then I remembered that I just made Him the owner. How would God’s business detract from His primary concern of relationship? It’s good to know that Jesus is the CEO and I’m going to have to trust Him to do what’s right for the business.

I’ve got a lot of great ideas for design and I want to recognize the source of creativity, Jesus Christ. I have also said it before, but I’ll say it again: Jamie is my inspiration! If you ever want to make some good art, find yourself a wise and creative queen and do whatever it takes to marry her.

I’m home from work today for President’s Day, but instead of vacationing, I decided to do some other work. It’s in preparation of my last day at my job this Friday when I’ll be free from the “nine to five” and will have to cajole myself into the self-discipline of the foreboding “freelance” work.

I’m working today on our church website as well as cooking, cleaning, and preparing for guests tonight. Of course I have to do some obligatory “work time” blogging as well.

I sent an email to my boss on Friday with that magical phrase: “Two weeks notice”. I believe it’s time to move on and I’m looking forward to what God has in store for me.

There will be plenty to do as I have my first paying client for web design and others on the horizon. I will be working with my Dad who just started a flooring business and of course, snow plowing when it comes. I’m also looking forward to taking some of the load off of Jamie with house work (can you believe it?).

This move will give me much more flexibility to explore different venues of work and education. I will remain open to missions work in the near future and be able to work toward that. I’m excited about the change! Hey, change is good (if it’s smart change).

Why do I consistently capitalize all letters in the word spam? I think maybe I wrote it that way for emphasis a few times. My brain went into gear and said “spam must be capitalized!” When I questioned it, I just figured it was an acronym (don’t ask me for what). There’s the brain doing weird things. It doesn’t make sense, so I won’t do it anymore.

That does bring up another question, though: Why doesn’t weird follow the rules (i.e. “I before E except after C and when sounds like A as in neighbor and weigh” [punny])? That’s bad enough as it is, but weird just has to be…weird.

A little known fact that I think even my wife is in the dark on: My favorite color as a child was yellow.

I was driving home from my Mom’s birthday party yesterday afternoon when all of a sudden, my head went BOOM! My eyes opened to watch my body quickly direct the car back onto the road and off the large median. I had some sort of revelatory blankness up there that, coupled with the painful shock, gave me an adrenaline pumping fear and alertness. Alert to the fact that the other cars around were avoiding me. Alert to the fact that I came to a grinding halt at the yellow light just ahead. Miraculously, I instilled no damage on the car, nor did I damage any of the nice trees on the high median which, I assure you, was not made for driving on. I’m glad that Jamie is safe in Michigan right now and I thank Jesus for protecting me (as I’m sure he did)!

It wasn’t really my fault. It was the car that actually went up there. I wasn’t directing it at all as my brain apparently either shut down or went somewhere else. I guess twelve hours of snow plowing with no sleep will do that to you. Somehow I safely made it through the last 25 minutes of the drive, surviving by fear and a constant muttering to myself about whatever I saw and especially, where I was.

Returning home, I promptly got undressed and into bed for a seven hour nap. The cat decided that was enough before eating was essential, so I got up. After eating some breakfast (or something) and feeding the cat, I read for a bit and snuggled in for my real seven hours of sleep. It was the cat that woke me up again, which was a good thing for once because I had my alarm set for Saturday’s wake up time. Not that it mattered much as the company I work at is on a two hour delay.

Thinking about the experience again this morning, I realized that many of us are like that too. We’re cruising down the road with no driver. God wants to come in and take the wheel to make sure we’re not flying around doing damage to ourselves and others. He wants to drive in style, not a piece of junk, so He plans a work of renewal and restoration that will make us the envy of that new Mercedes. Who is your owner and driver? Are you going the right way, but keep running into things, knowing that when the turn at the bottom of the hill comes, you’ll be headed for destruction? I’m sure you’ve heard it before, but Jesus wants to be the driver in your life. He wants you to end up parked in His beautiful mansion. He even goes way beyond this allegory, desiring a relationship with you! Don’t wait for a BOOM to wake you up!

I’ve really been missing Jamie lately. It’s only been three days since I saw her, but it’s the longest time we’ve been apart since we were married. The last time was for one night when I went camping with the guys. I’m glad she’s having a good time with family, but I’ll be happy when she’s snuggled in bed with me. = )

Thankfully, I ran across The Happy Husband and read some of his joyful and humorous posts. I was reminded again, with cheery nostalgia, how great Jamie is and how much I love her! Thanks to Eric Siegmund for the link!

My beautiful wife, Jamie is up and blogging at QueenGreen.com! She just made her first blog post ever and I’m so proud!

I’m excited to see her blogging because she is a good writer, has a lot of wisdom and great thoughts on all kinds of things. Now you don’t have to read her inspirational ideas second hand! That’s right, she’s my inspiration and the queen of my heart. Watch her words closely, but remember, she’s mine!

Love to the wife!

Almost exactly 24 years after I was born, I sat down in the laundry room and saw a headline in The Denver Post. Over a large picture of two young guys wearing hospital masks outside were the bold words, “Thailand: a mission redefined*”. I don’t ever read the paper nor had I ever seen one in the laundry room, but I had to wait for the towels to get done and the article looked interesting. Flipping the newspaper over to see the bottom, I noticed the sub headline, “As Springs-based Christians race to help, what they find horrifies and transforms them.*” The caption for the picture was also visible: “…They are volunteers with Colorado Springs’ Youth With a Mission, which plans to send 120 teams to the country to aid in rebuilding.*” By the way, the guy in the article is 24 years old!

Wow! That was enough to catch me. I grabbed the laundry and the paper and headed back to the apartment. I showed Jamie the article and she got excited about the possibilities. I thought she might have just thought, “hmm…”, but she began talking about the possibilities. Could this be the direction we’ve been looking for? Perhaps the semi-closed doors we’ve been experiencing were God’s way of making us wait. Just earlier that night I was pondering the difficulties I was having becoming an electrician. I was thinking about taking a risk and leaving my job which seems like a dead end. Not wanting to make a rash decision or get all superstitious about events, I went to bed, deciding to call YWAM today about it.

All the work I’ve had today, kept me busy until I took my lunch break. I called YWAM and an enthusiastic girl took down my information and was exciting that we were interested. She explained some of what they’re looking for: individuals and groups for short-term trips to help rebuild as well as long term missionaries willing to commit to the effort. The more I talked, the more excited I became at the possibilities. I knew it was more than possible if it’s God’s idea and I started thinking about getting my church involved. In fact, just last Sunday, our pastor announced that this year will be the “Year of Outreach”. The girl mentioned that they have community nights on Tuesdays and that we could stop by some time.

I called Phil, a good friend, our cell group leader and the worship leader in our church. I told him what had been happening and suggested we attend the community night for our cell group some time (also on Tuesdays). He was fine with the idea and mentioned that he was just telling the pastor two weeks ago that he felt a burden to go help out in Thailand! We think the church will definitely be on board if we plan something.

While I spoke with Phil, I got a message on my phone. It was from Jonathan, one of the leaders of the Tsunami Relief effort at the Colorado Springs YWAM base. He had gotten my information and was getting back to me. I called back and we shortly discussed where Jamie and I are at and what is happening with YWAM. He will know more information at the end of the week and will keep me posted.

I will be spending some serious time in prayer about this to try to determine God’s will. The excitement I’m feeling is the highest it’s been in quite a while and I look forward to what God has in store. I know it will be hard work and tough on us, but I always seem to be most fulfilled when I’m ministering to others. Just yesterday, I asked God that He would make my heart like His, giving me His love for those affected by the tsunami. He knows I’m a hands on person and this may be His answer (so soon)!

*All quotes: Meyer, Jeremy. “Thailand: a mission redefined” The Denver Post. Sunday, January 9, 2005. Page A1

Yesterday was a roller-coaster ride that thankfully ended well. The work day began with work from last week and continued on heavier than usual. It would have been nice to have a light day on my birthday, but it wasn’t to be.

I went to the local Community College to finish up my math test. Instead of doing that, I found the testing area full of people and several waiting. I turned around and came back to work, frustrated that I had wasted half an hour just driving. I called the College and they refused to take an appointment, but did say they were open until 7.30pm for two days before registration.

I got a lot of work at 3.00pm which was annoying and carried over to today, but by the end of the work day, I was feeling a bit more optimistic.

After work, I picked Jamie up and went to the college. One computer was open, woohoo! Unfortunately, my test was gone! They told me the system only holds them for two weeks, which would have been nice to know before I spent the time on the test. They were closed for a week as it was for the holidays and I couldn’t even get in every day on my lunch break. The worst thing was there attitude. They could’nt care less about me as they said I could take it again. Frustrated and angry, I left. How will I even know that something else won’t go wrong if I take it again. They obviously don’t care enough to do anything about it.

Going home thinking about doing laundry did not help matters. I did do laundry, though and Jamie went to the store for groceries. I got to spend some time on the computer and received a very encouraging email from two girls that were in our DTS wishing me happy birthday. I also found out that we should get back all the money we put in for taxes this year!

Jamie came home, started on supper and while I went back to the laundry room, she set up a nice birthday meal for me! There was cheesecake with 24 candles on it, a Winnie the Pooh balloon and Henry Weinhardt root beer. She sang happy birthday to me and we had a wonderful dinner with ice cream as an added bonus. That put me in a good mood.

I went back and finished up the laundry and then we called it an early night. So much for working out last night, but we both needed some sleep.

Today, I feel much better even though I have had non-stop work until now. In fact, I just got another order. Some exciting things are brewing, though.

Edit 2005.01.14: I changed “could care less” to “couldn’t care less”, because as Jamie pointed out this morning, the former doesn’t make sense.